If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
