Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
