In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
