Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
