I could have mohawked her pubes.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
