of course. lets lasso hookers.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
