so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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