Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Randomize
