Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
My legs feel like baby dolphins
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