I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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