i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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