FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize