I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
