Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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