He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
