how can u be prego again
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
