I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
