sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
They have beer where we have blood.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
