Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
