it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
