Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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