That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
