Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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