I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
