I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
honey bunches of taint.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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