she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
