I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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