I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Randomize
