I intend to get homeless drunk
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
