he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
