pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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