shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Your penis caused this!
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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