Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
