normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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