Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Randomize