Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
