just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
