doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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