Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
