if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
