Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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