nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
