Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
where are my eyebrows?
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