she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
