Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
