i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
