in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
