Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
