you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize