THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
