Quick, to the slutcave!
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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